zomg, i should slap myself right now._.
what is wrong with me?
the most important thing i'm gonna have to do after the mid years is to righten my biological clock/rhythm/whatever o_o (gah, have to read up on them some day after the mid years.)
it's totally out of whack.
i don't want to be nocturnal ):
nights are scary.
they really, really are.
i haven't had a good nights' sleep since, o_o
& i'm really scaring myself like that.
this isn't fun anymore.
i feel totally messed up.
even though my table's really much neater than usual and my bed's made and my school bag's packed and i sorta know how to study and my relationships with everyone is going perfectly fine.
yet i feel totally messed up! ): ):
like someone took me apart (ouch, gross) & reassembled me all jumbled up.
like looking at a jigsaw puzzle & feeling that you've got a tile/piece (more than one, in this case) out of place but you just can't figure out which ones, 'cos everything looks fine from where you are.
is this just some teenage angst-related phrase?
because i really hope so ):
omggggg what is wrong with me!
why am i doing this when i should be studying?!
like, aaaaaah.
like, a balloon.
i'm going to bursttttttttttttttttttttttt.
i suppose i need somewhere to vent ._.
or else the balloony me is going to kaboom.
like, sortof imagine pumping a balloon with helium (isit?) gas until it's so full.
like, almost bursting.
so to stop it from totally exploding & getting your face smacked with the rubber flying everywhere you poke a hole in the balloon so that it won't bang.
whatever, makes no sense but;
i kindof can't tell anything right now o_o
oh, another plausible idea: maybe it's the early-morning-nonsense syndrome._.
you know, being really groggy and blur and half-asleep in the morning. & being unable to control/channel your thoughts or what comes out of your mouth.
i shall rant at school._.
i'm wasting time here.
i don't know what's wrong with me! );
& not knowing scares me, really, really, really,
big time.