sorraye x8968976341902374! D;
anywayyyyyy
here's a post at a normal earthly hour:D
owells.
my results are kamikaze-ing._.
like seriously, majorly, unbelieveably, freakily so.
i don't want to think about the unacceptably low english compre results :/
it's like, rock-bottom low kinda thing D:
and no don't talk to me about the summary before i roar at you. Dx
and i think i flunked geography, because i switched to history mode while doing the paragraphy inference. and i left out non-biodegradable. D:!!
and i know i flunked chemistry because i sleep/talk/doodle/read/text/anythingbutpayattention during chemistry lessons.
well i try to in the first ten minutes. but after that my determination crumbles and since yeeying dosen't get it either i just give up.____.
at least mr goh said no one failed...
...
...
so far.
D:!
goshy.
and math was do-able, but still horrible.
(since i behave the way i do in chemistry lessons.)
thanks michy for the crash course you gave me yesterday xD
i think it saved my skinnnnnnnnn.
owells i think i'll pass.
(i hope).
ohyes and i gave up on the latter sections of the australian math thing and went to sleep.
been long since i slept so peacefully on my desk:D
...
meh.
...
...
...
...
...
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i just got back my organ grades.
agh crappppppp._.
lossa Bs ):
i did surprisingly well for sight reading tho xD
but i was 'unable to capture the "Tango" feel'
referring to the arrangement piece.
...
...
idwnathinkboutitanymore.
owells there were the fun times xD
like swooning over/discussing guys with peiyi cher charmaine ectttttt.
haha one of the perks of secondary school:D
no one from my primary school ever talked about such explicit matters :/
yeaaaaaah and the counsellor i have who creeps up behind me and shouts in my ear before hugging me xD
...and writing in my crap book
...and telling lame jokes xD
yay peixiarrrrr:D
yay and the number of trip. science classes just got reduced again:D
whee double science here i come!
2.4 this saturday again:D
& i know i'll like die halfway becus i'm crazily and indeniably unfit x_x
agh nevermind.
basically liying's been not doing well acedemically (don't care wrong spelling!) / musically. and how i cannot bring myself to have faith in Him is awful.
at least i'm okay emotionally. less extremes and stuff ._.
and at least i'm sortof clearer now, although -
.
.
.
.
.
and i feel undeserving.
of the love my parents shower me with, the very love i was blind to until now.
and i feel disgusted.
with myself and the way i'm behaving, and the way i know i'm going to disappoint my parents.
and i feel disappointed.
disappointed with who i am, who i'm being now.
and the truth is, i don't like who i am right now at all.
.
.
.
.
.
and people everywhere are changing, and sometimes -
.
.
.
"There's only your life, how you mess it up, and who is there to save you. or who isn't."
sometimes i feel like a butterfly; flamboyant, frivolous, flighty. yet ever so fragile. flittering from petal to flower; never really feeling secure, never really settling down.
and no, i'm certainly not referring to guys.
owell.
i wonder how this will all turn out: i hope it'll be good.
for now liying, you can smile, try harder, and hope for a better day.
:D